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"If you do not do either of these well, take steps to correct it at once.At least one talent is mandatory." Holding your liquor doesn't count.A lot of older men and women today are using online dating sites to find a partner. The answer might affect which traits you choose to look for.

While in an op shop recently, my eyes alighted on a black book with Esquire's Handbook for Hosts ascribed down its spine. "For some reason, men hate to see a woman doing anything with her hands when talking to her," Esquire marvels.

Don't talk - except to compliment Conversation is such a minefield.

I had decided I didn’t have time or energy to do online dating and I was just going to focus on me – my future, my career as a writer, getting myself into the right place – putting me first. We exchanged numbers and I texted him when I got back to my friend’s house (where I was staying over night) to say it was lovely to meet him and he texted back.

Then I went out on Saturday night and “boom” I met someone. Then we messaged each other on and off all yesterday.

We all have deal breakers and traits we absolutely don’t want in a partner; you should consider these, but you don’t have to broadcast them.

On the other hand, do about the things that make you uncomfortable in a partner.

Don't beat them at drinking games So you like a tequila and can drink more than a few beers without collapsing into a puddle of your own vomit? Being able to hold your booze is eminently unattractive.

"Undivided attention is best." This hands-off advice enters a grey area when it comes to dancing and bridge, at which a woman must be skilled.

Stop and think – first, about the kind of you’re looking for. My list of must-haves includes: What’s on your list?

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