Dating recovery validating problem
Melanie's healing and teaching methods have liberated thousands of people from the effects of narcissistic abuse world-wide.One of the most painful parts about a relationship with a narcissist is the accusations and ‘labels’ the narcissist puts on you.
Today I want to explain how when a narcissist accuses you of such atrocities he/she is actually speaking to a MIRROR.
I hope by explaining how the narcissist projects his/her behaviour onto you, you can let go of the feelings of unworthiness that the narcissist may have led you to believe about yourself.
This means fabricating, distorting, assigning significance to, or exaggerating what you said or did as ‘evidence’, and / or quoting third party allies which can also be fabricated.
You will be astounded after stating the facts and gaining some sort of sensibility (forcing the narcissist after a mammoth battle to admit the ‘truth’ regarding these fabrications) when at a later date the narcissist will deny all of that and default back to his or her fabricated version of projection.
Due to the narcissist’s self-disgust with his or her unhealed/ disowned parts, this is a necessary emotional survival mechanism.
He or she will inevitably This ensures two things: 1) You are punished for challenging the False Self, and 2) You become the atrocious person who has committed all of these unacceptable things (or at the very least have been the cause of them).When the ‘mask’ (False Self) can’t keep the cover up holding these feelings submerged (which it can’t indefinitely) these broken parts rush into the narcissist’s consciousness, and they feel horrendous for the narcissist. It is unthinkable, unbearable and will be avoided at all costs.Non personality-disordered people do not have this issue.It is the same False Self (ego) which tries so hard to be approved of, which when not being sustained by ‘the outside’ constantly (a necessity because it is not self-sustaining) becomes pathological and vengeful and behaves atrociously.This is what a monstrous ego (pain, fear and emptiness) does.The imperfect (unhealed) parts of the narcissist have been disowned by him or her, and therefore must be assigned elsewhere – and quickly – so that the narcissist does not have to face his or her worst fears – Narcissists don’t like the fact they are empty, needy for approval, pathologically envious, and have horrible thoughts about themselves and other people.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating